Mom Upset MIL Babysits SIL’s 2 Kids but Not Her 5 – Internet Gives Brutal Reality Check

BySizzy
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A mother of five boys, aged 16 to 15 months, shared that she is struggling to manage daily life. Her husband works long hours and is often not available to help with childcare or household responsibilities. Because of this, she is mostly handling parenting, cleaning, and daily routines on her own without much support.

She also feels upset about how her mother-in-law helps other family members. The mother-in-law lives only about 10 minutes away but spends a lot of time helping her daughter-in-law, who has two children. She regularly does tasks like school runs, babysitting, and household chores for her. However, when the mother of five asked for a small favor—just watching the children so she could quickly go shopping for essentials—she was told no because the mother-in-law said she was too tired after helping elsewhere.

As a result, the woman had to take all five children out in difficult conditions, including bad weather, to complete a basic errand. She found the experience very stressful, especially with a crying baby and another child struggling emotionally. This has left her feeling overwhelmed and unsupported.

Now she is questioning whether it is fair to expect more balanced help from her mother-in-law or whether she is asking for too much. The situation highlights common challenges around parenting stress, family support systems, childcare responsibility, and balancing help within extended families.

The poster shared that she has five children, ranging from 15 months to 16 years, and that looking after them is a lot of work since her husband never helps

Feeling Overwhelmed With Kids and Family Support: A Simple Explanation

This situation is about family support, childcare stress, and feeling overwhelmed when help is not shared fairly. It also includes topics like mental load, parenting burnout, and family favoritism.

Let’s break it down in simple English.

1. Parenting stress and mental load

Taking care of five children is very hard work. It includes:

  • feeding kids
  • school routines
  • cleaning and housework
  • emotional care
  • daily errands like shopping

When one parent does most of the work, it can lead to parenting burnout and emotional exhaustion.

Even if the other parent provides money, daily childcare and emotional work still feel very heavy when done alone.

In family wellbeing and parenting support topics, this is called the mental load of parenting.

2. Feeling unsupported at home

When help is missing, simple tasks like going shopping can feel very stressful.

Trying to manage young children in public places like supermarkets can be overwhelming, especially with babies and toddlers.

Many parents in similar situations feel tired, stressed, and emotionally drained when they do not have enough support.

3. Unequal help from family members

It can feel painful when one family member receives more help than another.

For example, when a mother-in-law helps one daughter-in-law more than another, it can create feelings of:

  • unfair treatment
  • emotional frustration
  • family favoritism
  • lack of support

Sometimes, this happens because of comfort, routine, or personal preference, but it can still feel unfair to the person who is struggling more.

In family relationship dynamics, this is a common cause of tension.

4. Asking for help is not wrong

Asking for help is normal and healthy.

Needing support for childcare, errands, or short breaks does not mean someone is weak. It simply means they are human and under pressure.

In parenting support and family care topics, even small help like:

  • 30 minutes of babysitting
  • help with shopping
  • short breaks for errands

can make a big difference.

5. Emotional impact of feeling ignored

When someone feels like their effort is not seen or supported, it can lead to:

  • stress
  • sadness
  • frustration
  • feeling alone
  • emotional burnout

Many parents describe moments of feeling overwhelmed and unsupported, especially when raising multiple children.

In parenting mental health discussions, emotional support is just as important as physical help.

6. How to talk about it calmly

Instead of arguing or blaming, it is often better to have a calm and respectful conversation.

A simple way to explain could be:

“I’ve been feeling really overwhelmed lately. Even a little help sometimes would make a big difference for me.”

This focuses on feelings and needs, not blame.

Good communication helps reduce family conflict and improves understanding.

People felt that the woman was being unreasonable by expecting her husband’s mom to always babysit

This situation is not about being ungrateful or demanding.

It is about:

  • parenting stress and burnout
  • mental load of childcare
  • feeling unsupported in daily life
  • wanting fair family support

In simple terms:

Raising multiple children is hard, and even small help from family can make a big difference. Feeling overwhelmed is normal, and asking for support is completely okay.

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