Would your friends consider you a comedian? Every group tends to have at least one person dedicated to cracking jokes. How do those designated jokesters do it?
One skill they’ve learned is to be perceptive, always keeping an eye out for comedic opportunities. They then take advantage of these moments, as seen in this list of funny people who didn’t miss their opportunity for a joke.
“My daughter when she said she wanted to be a Transformer for Halloween.”
Do you see that look she’s giving the camera? That’s the look she’ll be giving you for the rest of her life if you keep this up, but every time there will be less and less love in it.
“My wife and her best friend are so much the same.”
As is the case with many best friend duos. It’s an introvert’s dream to find a friend they can just sit in silence with while they’re both independently on their phone. Sometimes, the air of company is enough for it to be considered ‘hanging out’.
“Spilled my drink so the bartender made me a sippy cup.”
I find that bartenders can get away with doing more petty things like this to their customers, deservedly so, which must be a huge perk of the job. Everyone I know who’s worked customer service has wanted to demean a customer at least once.
“Missing dog in NJ.”
Wow, that’s a neat trick! Sorry that your dog got lost, but I think if I saw this, nothing could stop me from bolting in the opposite direction immediately. Maybe I should save the number in my phone just in case…
“I laid a concrete foundation for a shed today and left a surprise for any future homeowners who decide to tear it up.”
Someone who tears up concrete for a living came in to say that this would scare the daylight out of them. It’s always nice to receive an acknowledgement that your prank is, indeed, a good one, plastic bones and all.
“Shirt like it was made for me!”
I know the shirt is a joke, but it must actually suck to play rock paper scissors with that hand. Your scissors couldn’t cut through any paper, and your paper isn’t enough to cover a rock!
“Asked a passerby for a family photo. Nailed it!”
Well, you certainly have a unique photo from your trip at the very least! Many people in the comments were encouraging them to print it and frame it, or send it out with Christmas cards, so it can provide even more of a laugh.
“6 College bros and one brain cell between all of us.”
In your defense, spiral staircases are an absolute pain to move furniture up. Just remember, whatever you put up there, you’ll have to bring back down. Though, it looks like buddy on the right here might be too traumatized from this experience to help again later.
“Not sure why this Chinese restaurant has chairs in front of the toilet but my interest is now [piqued].”
This is where they host job interviews. The lobby is crowded and loud, the bathroom is private and quiet, which is a much better space. The bathroom is also where you’re at your most vulnerable, meaning they’ll get more genuine answers out of you.
“My dog saw a squirrel mid-snap, so now I just look like a tired toddler at the end of a day at Six Flags.”
The concept that your dog is the one leading you around on the leash all day is great. No wonder you’d be so tired, you’d have to sprint after every animal that pup spots all day long!
“It is my friend’s birthday and the girls he works with decided to make him feel special.”
Aw, how nice! No matter who you are, being the designated Birthday Princess always feels nice. A day all about you where you get to feel special and dolled up. His shocked face can’t hide his true feelings, I know he’s flattered by it too.
“My daughter made me this bracelet today.”
You know what? I would consider this a compliment, but I’m not a parent. Parents, is it enough to be considered not a bad guardian? Would this be satisfactory to you? Or would you work to bump that score up a little?
“Saw this on the car parked next to us today.”
The sticker is so small, it’s like a small reassurance to the actual owner that it’s not that bad. They have to stare at the dent every time they get in their car, so they added the sticker to make themself feel better about it.
“I moved in with my dad a little over a month ago. He asked me to clean my hair from the bathroom sink. I told him I didn’t know what he was talking about. This evening I came home to this.”
Everyone loves to have an ‘I told you so’ moment. As soon as you said you didn’t know what he was talking about, this man was on the hunt, seeking out every stray hair just to stick it to you. You’ve actually done him a great service with this.
“Celebrating my first divorceversary and the office girls bought me a cake.”
This is the type of support I’d want from my circle if this ever happened. Reminding you that it really is a celebration, nothing to be sad about here, and only new opportunities to look forward to! Plus, a cake!
“The escalator handrails in London are getting as needy as me.”
Is it wrong? Is it wrong for a railing to want a little comfort these days? After all, they tend to only be used, not really cared for. Next time you ride an escalator, thank that railing, give it a little pat, it’ll appreciate your kind words.
“Our employee overcooked the brownies, so we turned them into a coffee table. Taking Christmas Pre-Orders now.”
I can imagine the Etsy listing now. “Handmade, home-baked, this tiny table offers a lot of lift to whatever you choose to put on top. With sustainably sourced wooden legs and a lovely burnt brownie top, this table will have all your guests saying ‘wow’!”
“The sign I saw in this car.”
Either this poor soul has had the worst luck imaginable, or this is a brilliant plan to actually deter thieves. Unless they think it’s reverse psychology at play and they break in anyway just to check. This situation has layers.
“My kids inherited my childhood toys, and only my daughter wants to play with ‘dolls’. Action Man is now loving the sweet life.”
After thinking long and hard about it, Action Man realized all he ever truly desired was time with his family, so he decided to retire in order to spend more time with his frog-suit-wearing child and have a larger role in raising them.
“Just moved in and bought this sign…finally feels like home.”
The best part about owning a home is having the power to keep people away from it. That’s your property, if you don’t want anyone within a 100 foot radius of it, that’s within your rights! Kicking people out has never felt so good!
“I think someone was murdered at my local Kum and Go.”
Well, considering the crew that’s on the case, this crime was probably perpetrated by some businessman in a mask. No matter what cartoons make us think, he’ll probably stick out like a sore thumb, split up and get to looking!
I don’t think I’ve ever quite seen a cat frown in such a pronounced way. It’s clearly had enough of your jokes, it looks mad as hell.
“Yeah, real funny, another joke about my eye. That’s definitely fresh and new material from you. Uh-huh.”
“The wife is getting dinner ready… I think…”
Well, she is getting dinner ready, it’s your child that’s up to some shenanigans.
However, the pressing question on everyone’s minds isn’t even about your kid’s superior upper arm strength, it’s asking what the hell did Rob do that deserved a fridge callout?
“Finally, a new weapon in our war against infants!”
Only these are powerful enough to take out toddlers as strong as the one in the last photo, along with other super-powered babies that pose a threat to life as we know it!
“An Apple a day keeps the doctor away especially if you’re using compressed air.”
To be fair, this isn’t doctor exclusive. You could probably fire one of anything at anyone using compressed air every day and they’d want to stay far, far away from you for fear of injury or bodily harm.
“I’ve heard of motorcycle gangs, but looks like now there’s scooter gangs.”
I think I’d be even more scared of a scooter gang. Never have I seen someone riding on a scooter that didn’t look determined as hell, with clear, directional focus. They have a decisive type of mind that would not hesitate to ruin someone who dare look at their scooter the wrong way.
“Friend of mine saw this posted up around her neighborhood.”
This poster is merely a warning. Now that the dog is loose, there’s nothing you can do but make sure you always stay prepared. You never know when you could turn a corner and see it facing you down, giving you but a second’s head start before it runs at you. Good luck!
“Fiancé and I bought our first home before we hit 30.”
Congratulations! It definitely looks… cozy! Yeah, cozy, and rustic too. There’s a lot of potential here. Not to mention that it has an open concept floor plan, too, people love that nowadays. We’ll swing by with a housewarming gift, like a tape roller or some bubble wrap!
“[My] baby turned invisible today.”
Again with the superpowered babies! Usually, their powers aren’t discovered until they just hit toddler age, so this is some really early onset. This could be bad, this could mean your baby is the most powerful one yet. Start teaching them to use their powers for good!
“After a recent earthquake in my city, someone set up an earthquake detection device in my local park.”
Simple and effective, what a great addition to a public space! It could help detect all sorts of weather too, especially by adding a wig. Does it look like it just showered? Must be raining. Dry as a bone? Sunny. Wig gone? Windy.