AITA for telling my son to get over the divorce?
Based on the situation described, it seems the father may not be entirely in the wrong but could have handled the situation with more sensitivity. The father and his ex-wife made a mutual decision to divorce after their children were grown, maintaining an amicable relationship post-divorce. Their son Michael, however, struggled to accept their divorce and has occasionally made spiteful comments about it.
During a dinner celebrating Michael’s engagement, he made another comment about how traumatic the divorce was for him, which embarrassed his parents in front of their guests. The father then expressed his frustration, telling Michael it was time to move on and implying he should get over it. This caused Michael to withdraw for the rest of the dinner and later criticize his father for disrespecting his feelings and airing family issues in front of others.
While the father’s frustration is understandable, telling Michael to “get over it” may have been dismissive of his son’s lingering emotional pain. It’s clear that Michael’s feelings about the divorce are still sensitive and deeply felt, and he may need more understanding and empathy from his parents, especially in public settings.
In hindsight, the father could have taken Michael aside privately to discuss his feelings instead of addressing it publicly at the dinner table. This would have shown more respect for Michael’s emotions while still conveying the need for mutual understanding. Communicating privately could have also allowed the father to explain his perspective more fully without causing further embarrassment or conflict.
In conclusion, while the father’s intention might have been to encourage closure and move forward, the timing and public nature of his comments could have been handled more tactfully. Both parties could benefit from open communication and a deeper acknowledgment of each other’s perspectives on the past.
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