My Ex Chose His Roommate Over Me—So I Bought Out His Half of Our House
This Redditor (let’s call her OP) found herself in an increasingly toxic living situation with her now-ex-boyfriend and his freeloading best friend. The tipping point? Period shaming. Despite taking every sanitary measure — wrapping her tampons in tissue, placing them in a lidded trash can, and even compromising by getting a specific bathroom bin — her boyfriend and his best friend still had a problem with her using the main bathroom during her cycle.
Things escalated when the roommate began verbally abusing her, and instead of standing up for OP, her boyfriend enabled the behavior. When she gave him an ultimatum — either the roommate goes or she does — he picked the friend. That’s when OP took matters into her own hands. She ended the relationship and, as of yesterday, officially bought him out of their shared home. Now, she’s free — no more roommate drama, no more period shaming, and no more enabling.
A period is a natural part of life and basic hygiene
But for this woman, it became a breaking point in her relationship
This story isn’t just about tampons. It’s about respect, hygiene shaming, and how deep internalized misogyny still runs — even in supposedly “modern” relationships. Let’s dig into the real issues at play here.
🔴 Period Shaming: Still Alive and Kicking in 2025
We’re way past the era where periods were considered taboo, right? Wrong. According to a 2023 study by Plan International, 1 in 3 women say they’ve been made to feel ashamed or embarrassed by a partner over their period. OP’s story is just one in a sea of experiences where natural bodily functions are treated like moral failures.
Let’s be clear: OP wasn’t leaving dirty pads lying around. She went above and beyond — wrapping products, buying specific bins, even using plastic bags. But to her ex and his roommate, it still “wasn’t good enough.” Because this wasn’t about hygiene. It was about control, power, and weaponizing shame.
That kind of behavior echoes toxic masculinity and body shaming — things we’re still unlearning as a society. And yes, it’s exhausting that women are still expected to go out of their way to make others comfortable about their biology.
🛋️ The Freeloader Roommate Dynamic
OP’s ex let his best friend live rent-free in a home she paid more into. And when things got tense, not only did the boyfriend fail to back her up — he let that same roommate verbally abuse her. That’s a red flag buffet.
Roommate situations in relationships can work, but only with boundaries and balance. In this case, OP’s ex was clearly more loyal to his friend than to his partner. That kind of third-wheel interference can rot a relationship from the inside out — especially when the third wheel thinks he’s in charge.
According to relationship expert Dr. Ramani Durvasula, enablers often don’t realize how damaging their passivity is. When a partner consistently chooses neutrality in conflict, they’re not staying out of it — they’re taking a side. OP’s boyfriend sided with the abuser by doing nothing.
🏡 Property Ownership After Breakups
OP and her ex jointly owned the house — and buying out a partner during a breakup is more common than you might think. It’s also tricky. But OP seems to have handled it legally and fairly. Let’s break down how this usually works:
- Equity Buyout: This means one party pays the other for their share of the home’s equity. In OP’s case, she likely got the house appraised, subtracted the mortgage, and paid her ex his share — plus a little extra.
- Clean Legal Transfer: She mentions doing it “legally,” meaning she probably filed a quitclaim deed or similar document to transfer ownership fully into her name.
High CPC Keywords: home equity buyout, quitclaim deed after breakup, legal steps to buying partner out of house, co-owning house with partner breakup, toxic roommate eviction
For anyone in a similar situation, legal experts recommend documenting everything, using a real estate attorney, and making sure title changes are officially recorded with your county.
👏 Not All Abuse Is Physical
One key takeaway from OP’s follow-up is this: just because there wasn’t physical abuse doesn’t mean the relationship was healthy. Verbal abuse, manipulation, and gaslighting are just as damaging — especially when you’re being told your natural body functions are “disgusting” and don’t belong in your own home.
According to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence (NCADV), verbal and emotional abuse often go unnoticed but can leave lasting psychological trauma. When OP’s boyfriend stood by and let his friend degrade her — in her own house — that crossed a serious line.
🛑 “You Threw It Away Over Tampons”
Let’s address the people saying she was too quick to end things. This wasn’t just about tampons. It was about feeling safe and respected in your own home. The fact that he was willing to side with a freeloader roommate over the woman he co-owned a home with? That speaks volumes.
Also, let’s be real: if gender roles were reversed and a woman let her roommate scream at her boyfriend about nosebleeds or bodily functions, people would be furious. But because it’s a woman and periods, somehow she’s the unreasonable one? Nah.
And for those accusing her of “cleaning him out” — she paid him. She didn’t steal the house. She offered him options, and he took the payout. He also apparently took almost everything inside the house. Couches, dishes, appliances — even stuff he didn’t use. That’s not a clean breakup, that’s petty revenge.
She then joined the conversation in the comments
OP’s final note says it best: “I can now dispose of my tampons however I wish.” That line is about more than trash cans. It’s about taking control of her space, her body, and her peace.
She didn’t walk away from a relationship over tampons. She walked away from someone who showed her his priorities — and they didn’t include her safety, dignity, or comfort.
She did what a lot of people are too scared to do: she stood her ground, handled her business legally, and chose herself.