“My husband has been lying to me about our finances and we are FD. AITA?”

In a troubling revelation, a wife has uncovered a severe financial crisis within her family, largely due to her husband’s mismanagement. Despite an annual income of $140,000, her husband has accumulated $50,000 in credit card debt, alongside $50,000 in a home equity loan. The couple, who had initially managed their finances with a reasonable mortgage and car payments, now finds themselves behind on both their mortgage and car payments. The wife, who quit her $30,000-per-year job three years ago to focus on their children, had believed their financial plan was sound. Their strategy involved her returning to work once their middle child was in kindergarten to reduce daycare costs.

However, despite cutting back on expenses and maintaining a frugal lifestyle—cooking from scratch, using cloth diapers, and buying second-hand clothes—the financial strain has worsened. The wife is now facing the difficult decision of dropping out of school to afford childcare, impacting her future earning potential. This financial turmoil mirrors a painful past experience: the wife’s father had similarly jeopardized her mother’s financial stability, a situation she had feared repeating.

The situation is further complicated by the wife’s emotional turmoil, as she had trusted her husband completely and thought their marriage was ideal. She now faces the daunting task of uncovering how the funds were misused and finding a path forward to recover from the mounting debt and arrears.

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