A guy comes home from the bar

A man comes residence from the bar drunk one evening round three within the morning.

His spouse is sleeping and he’s attempting to sneak into mattress.

He’s laying in mattress for a couple of minutes and cuts a fart.

His spouse wakes up and asks, “What the hell was that?”

He replies, “Landing, I’m profitable 7 nothing.”

She thinks to herself “I’m gonna repair him.”

Then she lets one unfastened.

He yells at her, “What was that?”

She replies “Landing, tie rating.”

Now he thinks, “I’m gonna repair her.”

He’s laying there for about 10 minutes attempting to work one up.

He tries so arduous he shits in mattress.

The spouse asks, “Now what the hell was that?”

He replied, “Half time, change sides.”