"AITA for telling my family that this ancient geriatric mom has no time for their jealousy?"

In this scenario, the protagonist, a 39-year-old woman, found herself at odds with her family’s traditional expectations regarding marriage and parenthood. Unlike her relatives who typically started families in their early twenties, she chose to wait until her thirties, citing personal readiness and financial stability as factors. Throughout her twenties, she faced judgment and criticism from her family, who labeled her decision as selfish and impractical, often referring to her as “ancient” or “geriatric” due to her age when she eventually had children.

The strain on their relationship escalated to the point where she went low contact with her family for several years to shield herself from their disparaging remarks. During this time, she focused on building a secure environment for herself and her eventual family. When she reconnected with her family, she was confronted with accusations of flaunting her lifestyle and making her nieces and nephews feel inadequate due to the vacations and gifts she provided for her own children.

Feeling unfairly attacked, she decided to address the issue directly by creating a group chat and asserting her boundaries. She expressed that she would not tolerate their jealousy and reiterated that her choices were valid and not meant to provoke anyone. She warned that if the negativity persisted, she would escalate to no contact. Her family reacted defensively, accusing her of unnecessary provocation and taunting them.

In considering whether she was the asshole (AITA), it’s evident that her decision to wait to have children and her subsequent success in providing for them should not be grounds for jealousy or resentment from her family. She defended herself against years of criticism and stood up for her right to live her life on her own terms, which included enjoying vacations and treating her children well. While her family’s feelings of jealousy and inadequacy are understandable given their own struggles, their attempts to guilt and criticize her were unwarranted and hurtful. Therefore, in this situation, she is not the asshole (NTA) for asserting herself and setting boundaries to protect her own happiness and well-being.

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