My (28F) Stepsister (29F) slept with my ex-fiancé (37M) and married him. It’s been 5 years and my family think I should be over it already.

You’ve endured a profound betrayal from your stepsister Kelly and your ex-fiancé Ryan, who not only engaged in a relationship behind your back but flaunted it in a cruel manner. Your family’s response to this trauma has been dismissive and hurtful, pushing you to “move on” despite the deep wounds that still linger. Their insistence on normalizing the situation and pressuring you to reconcile with Kelly and Ryan is exacerbating your pain rather than offering support.

Your decision to quietly remove yourself from the situation when you discovered the betrayal was a testament to your strength and resilience. Despite the ongoing pain, you’ve managed to build a new life with a supportive partner and are now expecting a child. However, the scars of betrayal don’t simply fade with time, and it’s understandable that you’re still grappling with the aftermath of such a devastating betrayal.

Your family’s failure to acknowledge the severity of the situation and their attempts to sweep it under the rug are further compounding your distress. Their insistence on maintaining a relationship with Kelly and Ryan while disregarding your feelings is deeply hurtful and invalidating. It’s evident that their priorities lie in preserving the facade of familial harmony rather than prioritizing your emotional well-being.

Your recent confrontation with your mom and stepdad highlights the ongoing tension and underscores the need for boundaries. Their response, characterized by defensiveness and attempts to minimize your pain, only serves to perpetuate the cycle of invalidation. While you may prefer not to sever ties completely, it’s crucial to establish clear boundaries to protect your emotional health and that of your growing family.

Seeking support from your husband and the family members who have shown understanding and empathy can provide you with the strength to navigate this challenging situation. Surrounding yourself with individuals who validate your feelings and prioritize your well-being can help counteract the toxic dynamics within your extended family.

Communicating your boundaries firmly and consistently, while acknowledging the complexity of your emotions, is essential in asserting your needs and protecting your mental health. While it may be difficult, prioritizing your own healing journey and the well-being of your immediate family is paramount.

Ultimately, the decision to maintain or sever ties with your extended family rests with you and should be guided by what brings you peace and emotional stability. Remember that your feelings are valid, and you deserve to be supported and respected as you navigate the aftermath of such profound betrayal.

Let’s start the story.