'AITA for not helping my neighbors?'

From an outside perspective, the situation between the original poster (OP) and their new neighbors seems to stem from differing expectations and boundaries around neighborly responsibilities. Initially, the OP and their family had a strong relationship with their elderly former neighbor, Mr. B, where they provided regular assistance with snow removal, lawn care, and other tasks out of kindness and concern.

When Mr. B passed away and new neighbors moved in, the OP made efforts to inform them about the local climate and the necessity of having their own tools for yard maintenance and snow removal. Despite this, the new neighbors did not acquire the necessary equipment and seemed to rely on the OP’s continued generosity.

Tensions escalated when a significant snowfall occurred, and the new neighbor expected the OP to clear their driveway, assuming it was part of the ongoing neighborly help. The OP, however, chose not to do so, asserting that they were not obligated to provide this service and had already communicated this boundary previously.

The conflict reached a head when the new neighbors confronted the OP about their decision, blaming them for having to miss work due to the uncleared driveway. This left the new neighbors upset and the OP’s wife questioning whether they should have just helped out despite their feelings.

In evaluating the situation, while the OP’s previous assistance to Mr. B was commendable and created a precedent of neighborly care, it wasn’t automatically transferrable to the new neighbors without explicit agreement or expectation management. The OP communicated their boundaries clearly about not wanting to be responsible for ongoing snow removal for the new residents, which is reasonable given their own time constraints and the fact that snow removal is typically considered a personal responsibility or one handled through hired services.

Therefore, while the new neighbors might feel let down or surprised by the OP’s decision, the OP’s stance does not make them the asshole in this scenario. They have the right to set boundaries around the assistance they provide, especially when it involves significant time and effort. Clear communication and mutual understanding about such expectations could help prevent further misunderstandings in the future.

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