“AITA for telling my BIL and his wife that I don’t want to follow their birth plan?”

You’re experiencing a complex situation as a surrogate for your brother-in-law, Simon, and his wife, Michelle. Their struggles with infertility led them to request your help, but their controlling behavior and insistence on a specific birth plan have caused significant tension. Despite your generosity, you’ve been met with disregard for your own preferences and experiences throughout the pregnancy.

The disagreement reached a peak when you expressed your refusal to adhere to their desired unmedicated water birth plan, citing past traumatic experiences and discomfort with the idea. Their response, insisting that they have the right to dictate the birth experience, exacerbated the conflict. Emotional outbursts and hurtful remarks ensued, leading to a rift between you and your in-laws.

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Support from your husband, James, has been unwavering, with both of you distancing yourselves from Simon and Michelle to process the situation. Even your oldest child and James’ parents have rallied behind you, recognizing the validity of your concerns and the need for respectful communication.

As your due date approaches, tensions remain high, and you’re torn between wanting to maintain peace and ensuring your own well-being during labor. Despite feeling conflicted and questioning your actions, you’re navigating a challenging situation with empathy and consideration for all involved.

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