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“AITA for wanting divorce bc I think wife intentionally got pregnant when I didn’t want more kids?”

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In a challenging marital situation, a husband (46) finds himself contemplating divorce due to a pregnancy he suspects his wife (43) intentionally initiated against his wishes. Married for a decade with three sons, their relationship has largely evolved into a co-parenting arrangement, leaving him yearning for emotional and physical intimacy. Despite expressing his reluctance for more children repeatedly, his wife has persistently desired a fourth, a point of contention that has strained their marriage.

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Despite his wife’s use of birth control and consistent timing, she recently revealed her pregnancy, eliciting devastation from her husband. He feels overwhelmed and emotionally isolated in their dynamic, suspecting that his wife may have purposefully disregarded his stance on having more children. This suspicion is compounded by her recent initiations of intimacy, which have been rare in their relationship.

Considering divorce, he grapples with the ethical dilemma of potentially disrupting their children’s lives. His dedication to fatherhood is unwavering, and he intends to pursue equal custody. Despite numerous requests for marriage counseling, his wife has refused, exacerbating their communication breakdown and his loss of trust in her.

Ultimately, he seeks clarity on whether pursuing divorce would make him the antagonist in this narrative. His deep love for his children contrasts with his emotional unfulfillment and the breach of trust he perceives in his marriage, forcing him to weigh the potential fallout of a divorce against his own happiness and well-being.

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EDIT:

Here’s what top commenters had to say about this one:

No-Lifeguard-8273 said:

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peakpenguins said:

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