AITA for not letting my homeless boyfriend move in with me?

In a challenging relationship dilemma, a 30-year-old woman is facing criticism from her 27-year-old boyfriend for not allowing him to move into her condo. The couple has been on and off for nearly three years, with the woman feeling the relationship isn’t working despite their love for each other. She is financially stable, owning her own condo, and desires a partner who contributes equally to their shared life. Her boyfriend, currently unemployed and living with his brother rent-free, has been unable to offer financial or domestic support, leading to tensions between them.

The boyfriend’s lack of stable employment and reluctance to improve his situation are significant issues for the woman. He previously worked as a car mechanic and a delivery driver but lost both jobs due to personal issues. His current living arrangement involves staying with his brother and sister-in-law without contributing to household expenses. Despite expressing interest in joining the military, he has faced repeated rejections.

Adding to the complexity, the boyfriend’s cat, which has feline leukemia, cannot be adopted by the woman due to her existing pets and the risk of spreading the illness. The boyfriend has even threatened to rehome the cat if she doesn’t agree to let him move in. He argues that if she doesn’t support him at his lowest, she doesn’t deserve him at his best. However, the woman feels strongly that allowing him to live with her without contributing or showing responsibility is not acceptable.

In this situation, the woman is grappling with whether she is in the wrong for setting boundaries and refusing to let her boyfriend move in under these conditions. Despite her emotional investment and belief in his potential, she is firm about her need for a partnership where both individuals share responsibilities and contribute equally.

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